Online Dating Isn't A Replacement For Therapy

Hi! I’m not sure if you answered this but I tried looking through some of your videos and didn’t find anything. I am talking to a guy through hinge and he asked what I’m looking for. I said a relationship and asked him. He said “I’m looking to settle down. But won’t settle” then went on to say he has some mistrust from past relationships. Is this as big of a red flag as it seems to me or am I misreading?

As I’ve said in other posts, when a man asks a woman what she’s looking for in their very first conversation, it’s usually because he’s looking for something casual. Women often ask this question as well, but when they do, it’s usually as a protective measure. They’re trying to weed out men who aren’t on the relationship track.

The problem with this question is that what we want in the abstract and what we want in the moment are often two different things. Abstractly, someone might want a relationship down the road. In the moment, though, they’re just looking to go on some dates and s…